26 July 2012

"Great, I'll have to sit through the ice capades again, it's not worth it..."

"What the hell, it's not all a drag..."

One of my favorite scenes from Hannah and Her Sisters.

We'll both take it easy...

A long time theme song...

"Now I do as I please and lie through my teeth
Someone might get hurt, but it won't be meI should probably feel cheap but I just feel free...And a little bit emptyNo, it isn't so hard to get close to meThere will be no argumentsWe will always agreeAnd I'll try and be kind when I ask you to leaveWe'll both take it easy..."

-Bright Eyes

24 July 2012

Swept Ashore...

I must've seemed to you a shipwreck
I looked at you, I saw an island
So I was swept ashore, to lie forevermore
Or at least for the evening

So we went to your apartment
We shared a drink out in the garden
You thought I must've pulled this kind of shit
With any willing fool
I shrugged and asked if that's a problem
So we loved if for an instant and for an instant I forgot
Who I was
So for the night, I was all yours
So I'm sure it was fleeting, and I'm sure I've been misleaded
We were just two people in need, it doesn't have to be
Some fucked up tragedy

I hope I didn't seem to vulgar
When I asked to come over
It's just these last few weeks
Well, they've been hard on me
I got burned and I can't seem to recover
And so we loved or so it seemed
And as I slept, I dreamt of Romeo and Juliet
But Romeo was just playing dead
I'm sure it was just a dream
And I'm sure it holds no meaning
But on this sober, hungover morning
Why does it always got to be such a fucked up tragedy?

I tried to tell you but I couldn't
I wanted to warn you but I need you so bad
I mean right now, you're all I have

15 July 2012

This is how it works...

"This is how it works,
You're young until you're not
You love until you don't
You try until you can't
You laugh until you cry
You cry until you laugh
And everyone must breathe
Until their dying breath..."

14 July 2012

JTE and the Apple

Since I haven't been on the Face, I wanted to share with all of you some videos from the last couple of shows I've had the pleasure to attend in the last couple of months.

In early June, Michelle and I trekked over to the Ryman for the Justin Townes Earle show. It was fantastic. 

Michelle and I on the way downtown, with a special treat to-go.

Michelle and I at the JTE show at Ryman, June 2, 2012
And some videos for your listening/viewing pleasure...

And then, last night, Erin and I made our way down to the Ryman to see Fiona Apple. The show was tremendous and the Apple brought the house down. 

I adore this picture of Erin, caught mid-laugh.

Erin and I celebrating the Apple, among other things. 

And again, some videos for your listening/viewing pleasure...

All in all, these were both two great shows that I loved getting to share with two wonderful women. 

Next up: The Tallest Man on Earth on the 23rd. 

12 July 2012

"Beware doll, you're bound to fall"

The long haul upwards begins today; however, on my way home from my meetings today...I played this one over and over again. I'm still working out the characters in my life...the mystery tramp without alibis and vacuous eyes, the diplomat with his Siamese cat who took all he could steal, and Napoleon in rags with his language that I can't refuse...but let's say this, I visited a pawn shop in the last couple of weeks. Yeah, resonance, loads of resonance.

"Beware doll, you're bound to fall."

10 July 2012

Finding the way back…

Apparently since my self-imposed FacialWorld restriction, I feel the need to write far more blog posts. I don’t know if this is good or bad yet, but rather, I do know I’m spending far more time in my head than thinking in terms of FacialWorld posts. Yes, my addiction runs deep. “…is listening to Fiona Apple and drinking red wine.” Yes, I previously thought like this all the time. Every moment of the day.

Yes, I’ve been having a particularly rough time as of late. We’ve got a Flaming Lips “too heavy for Superman” situation lately. When I recently recounted the details of the last couple of months via email to my friend Ashley (currently residing in Wales), she basically reiterated to me that in the last couple of months, I’ve experienced an intense amount of trauma. Yup, it is true. I’ve dealt with some issues with close friends, who have been struggling intensely…and subsequently, the loss of them while they work out these issues. I’ve found myself in a long-distance relationship. I’ve lost my grandmother. I’ve watched some of my best friends struggle with the heaviness of loss, relationships, and generally, the malaise that comes with finding your way through day-to-day life. I allowed some toxic people back into my life, even if only for a short period of time. I’ve allowed some of my relationships to become toxic. And when the universe felt like it hadn’t really dealt me a full hand, I’ve recently been trying to sort things out in my head about said long distance relationship, particularly after some distressing situations in the last couple of weeks.

So, fuck yes, it’s been a complicated summer. I usually embrace summer. But this summer, well, I’ve got a couple of words for it: pal carajo. It’s been difficult and as per usual, I haven’t been dealing with all the loss in a positive way. The haze of my grandmother’s death continues to hang over me, day to day, like a deep fog. But, every day, I wake up hoping the next day will be better. That one morning, I’ll wake up and feel like working again and embracing the summer. That one day, I’ll get my groove back and all will be well. I’m making the proper moves to push this into full throttle, which I won’t get into. However, I did find myself laughing and dancing for the first time in a few weeks today.

See, today, I finally ventured out of the house for the first time in four days. Yes, I haven’t actually left the house, outside of walking up to the closest store, in four days. I haven’t spoken more than four words to someone in person and out loud in over four days. But today, I forgot to cancel my hair appointment (which I had wanted to do, because well, simply talking to people felt exhausting)…and so, instead of calling the last minute to cancel, I made myself get up and out. I’m not generally the kind of gal who feels better once visiting the salon…but I found that talking to my most wonderful stylist, Andrea; I started feeling a little better. Andrea and I have had a relationship for four years now. (Holy shit, I’m starting to get freaked out about the reiteration of the number four.) This means that Andrea and I have known each other for longer than most of the people I know in Nashville. So, despite the fact that we have a relationship based on her making my hair look fantastic, I consider her a good friend. We always talk constantly while she is working. And, I think, just simply talking to her…it felt comforting. It felt relieving to speak the words out loud to someone about what I’ve been going through lately and to simply hear someone say to me, “Katherine, you have been going through a lot of shit lately.”

But that wasn’t all. After my appointment, I met my best friend Art for some mediocre Mexican food downtown. Given my withdrawal from the world, Art and I haven’t seen each other in about a week and a half. Yes, this is a long time for the two of us. While our conversation was heavy at times, by the time we drifted over to the British pub, I found myself laughing and dancing while we played some of our favorite tunes on the jukebox. Suddenly, everything felt a little lighter. Hearing my words reflected in the conversation with one of my best friends was exactly what I needed. While I waited for the bus to get home and listened to The National, I realized how incredible my friends are…how they know just what to say to improve my mood. In other news, we’ve decided to make a reality show based on our adventures in Nashville—just me and Art. He has likened it to that Jersey Shore show, where he’ll be Snooki (is that how it is spelled?) and I’ll be The Situation; however, I think this is simply a cheap ploy to get me to watch the show. But I’ll be strong. I won’t do it. I swear I won’t. Never. So, keep watching kids. Soon, you might see a video of a bird eating a tortilla chip. I promise, it was riveting. Here’s a picture to keep you anticipating our first official video.

Perhaps more related to the blog, there has been one album that I’ve been obsessed with lately. Fiona Apple’s latest album. I was never a big fan of her back in the day. For some reason when I was younger, it just didn’t resonate. But, I listened to the new album and now I’ve found myself exploring all her older work too. Given that I’m not on FacialWorld, few people know that I’ve recently become obsessed with the Apple, which made what happened next incredibly serendipitous. I had the wonderful fortune of receiving a free invitation to see the Apple at the Ryman this Friday by my good friend Erin. It was perfectly timed. And I can’t thank Erin enough for the invitation. Hopefully, while I silently weep to each song, she won’t regret the invitation. I can’t wait to share the experience with one of the kindest person I know.

This blog post feels scattered, but so does my mind right now. I’m working it out. I’m trying to find my way back to productivity. I’m trying to find my way back to feeling stable with everything that has happened recently. But I discovered tonight that with the comfort of my good friends, I’ll find my way back. Slowly, oh so slowly, I’ll find my way back to things that are really important to me. And for that, I’m eternally grateful. 

Pronto, mis panas. Por favor por todo.

09 July 2012

"I'll see you in another life...when we are both cats."

When I finally ventured outside today, I had a "Vanilla Sky" moment. You know, when the world feels slightly off. Different. Quiet. Moving in slow motion. While walking, I decided I needed a theme song. A song that would encapsulate everything that is going on in my life at this moment. Often, I like to do this by putting my iPod on shuffle, which I call "iTunes Roulette" or what previously was known as the "radio game." I put a lot of stock in random occurrences. So, I thought, the first song that plays, that will be my theme song. And I'll be damned it it wasn't this one...How perfect.

While I listened and wiped the tears from my eyes, I heard these lines from Vanilla Sky in my head.

David: "Do you remember what you told me once? That every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around."

Sofia: "I'll find you again."

David: "I'll see you in another life...when we are both cats."

Methinks this means I should watch Vanilla Sky tonight...and hope that tomorrow is a better day than the past 190 days.

07 July 2012

An update from the abyss

Since I'm not on FacialWorld these days, there is so much I'd like to say, but I'm going to be reserved, since the whole world seems to be falling apart and "The Doctor" is missing....instead, we've got this to remind us of what it feels like...

Every Single Night: Fiona Apple